Number 25. Have a signature dish.

Number 25. Have a signature dish.

This is really hard when you enjoy cooking all sorts of different foods both sweet and savoury to pick one and claim it as your signature dish! I think my family however ask me to make cheesecakes more than anything else so I've decided to say the 'Strawberry Cheesecake' I make is my signature dish as it is rather scrummy!

Ingredients

230g digestive biscuits
80g unsalted butter melted
200g white chocolate
400g mascarpone cheese
100ml sour cream
300ml double cream
80g caster sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
400g strawberries
50g unsalted pistachios crushed


Method

1. Using a food processor blitz down the biscuits to fine crumb, add to a bowl and mix in the melted butter. Place the mixture into a buttered 23cm loose-bottomed spring form cake tin, compress down and chill in the fridge for 20 minutes.
2. Melt the white chocolate in the microwave or in a bowl over a pan of gently simmering water then set aside to leave to cool slightly.
3. Cream the mascarpone, chocolate, sour cream and sugar together along with the vanilla extract.

4. Whip the double cream then fold the two together. Hull and halve the strawberries then place round the outside of the tin in an ordered fashion. Place a few more in the bottom of the tin then cover with the cheesecake mixture, smooth the top with a spatula or palette knife then chill for at least 1 hour to set.
5. Remove from the tin then decorate with the remaining strawberries and the crushed pistachios just before serving.

Number 34. Give something away every time I get something new.

Number 34. Give something away every time I get something new.

Well I can safely say I have given away stacks of stuff this year....clothes, furniture, toys, etc...
Have given to charity, friends and neighbours. I am very fortunate and lucky enough to have had lots of new things for me, the kids, Rund, and we've had quite a bit of work done on the house so its meant a year of giving has definitely been achieved.

Number 28. Play a board game with my kids every week.

Number 28. Play a board game with my kids every week.

This is a failure!! Lydia and James love playing games as a family, and when I added this to my list I thought it would be so easy to do, I was wrong! Should have said once a month, might have been more realistic, and even then we haven't done that!

We've had such a busy exciting year that most weekends we've had something on, and if we have had a quieter weekend it usually involves the kids having their friends round, sleepovers etc...

My intentions were good and I will continue to play games with them as and when time allows as I think it is good family bonding time...until someone cheats and it all kicks off!!

Number 15. Read more.

Number 15. Read more.

I've always had a love of reading, I read avidly as a child and could get quite lost in the pages! Unfortunately the older I have become I seem to be reading less and less, or I go through phases of reading a succession of books and then nothing for quite some time!

This has been a hard one to succeed at this year, I'm not making excuses but with trying to find the time to watch a 100 films and all the other things that life involves you in, reading has again been lacking this year. In fact I have a pile of books on my bedside cabinet waiting to be picked up!

It is something I will rectify I think probably as the winter days settle in and I've finished watching loads of films and celebrating my 40th!!

Number 13. Make peace with those whom peace needs to be made.

Number 13. Make peace with those whom peace needs to be made.

This is a hard one, it kind of links in to the forgive everybody task but also runs deeper than that!
Without airing any dirty laundry and boring people there are two separate situations in my life which for a few years have caused me a lot of heart ache and have effected my health, especially my mental health significantly.

I have been criticised for not having this as number one on my list (by the other side of the disagreement) but it wasn't foremost in my mind, purely and simply because it had been going on for a few years before writing my list last year and and I didn't know if I wanted to go 'public' with it or not. 

I've also been told that apparently I now only want to sort things out because it's on my list, totally untrue, I've always wanted a reconciliation, if you want to sort things out it doesn't matter when, what day, what year you just do it because you want things to be right! If people don't want to sort things out before I turn 40, so I don't achieve this on my list then that really says more about their mentality than it does mine! 

The main thing I have wanted and will always want is for differences to be resolved and for things to be better than they are.

On a personal level the upset significantly lowered my confidence, made me feel like I was wrong and a bad person, and feeling attacked all the time and lied about just makes you feel like you are in a big hole you cant climb out of. I'm not an evil or nasty person, I am a very honest person and if someone has done wrong by me, or my husband, my kids, or someone I care about I will defend them and stand up for them. I appreciate not everyone likes their wrongs pointing out, but if you have done wrong by someone then why should you get away with it, why should you not realise you have hurt someone? I believe if you have done wrong you should say sorry and face up to the consequences.

I understand that not everyone likes straight talking, or face to face discussion, some people like to hide behind text messages, ignore you completely, or talk behind your back. I prefer to discuss a problem, let both sides say their issues and then move on.

I am quite happy to and will always say I am sorry when I have done wrong, but unfortunately in both the situations that have happened, I have said sorry, but this still isn't enough for them and I have had no apology in return. I can therefore really do no more. 

I have tried my hardest throughout the year to improve things, I will always try as I think in both cases its not just me I have to consider but its my husband and kids too.

The major change for me this year is that I'm not allowing the anger to take hold of me, I have forgiven them, I can't make people change their minds about me or force them to have a relationship with me. I would prefer people to make up their own minds and not just form part of a 'pack' of disliking me for the sake of disliking me but again I can't change other peoples reactions or thoughts they have to want and do this for themselves. I just wish people would realise that there are always two sides to every story.

It's hard to stand up to a pack of bullies telling you what you should and shouldn't do who are telling lies about you, and want to bring you down and ridicule you at every opportunity. When you are an individual to stand up and be strong is the hardest part and I've realised that as much as you may want to change things some people just won't move on. 

I can live with myself, my heart is a lot calmer, I really don't want conflict.
I know I treat every day as a new day, I try and help and be there for as many people as I can and I always try to do the right thing! I also have the support of many wonderful people who when times are tough help pick me up, but I will never ever go back to the darkness that once consumed me, life is definitely for living and if you let the past control your future then there really is no hope!

Number 12. Forgive everybody.

Number 12. Forgive everybody.

Hmmmmm, I think I have done reasonably well with this...I would say I can forgive fairly easily but forgetting is the hardest part!!

Some situations have arisen this year, not many thankfully but when they have I remembered that this is part of my challenge so it has made me think carefully before responding.

There are some situations and people you meet who of course upset you, it may be someone serving you in a shop who is a bit rude, it may wind you up but I guess most people have a reason why they react in a certain away and we don't always know or understand that!

Life is too short to hold grudges, they make you bitter, I like to try and understand where people are coming from, to listen to what someone is saying, not everyone gives me the same courtesy but that is there problem and I can't do anything to change that! If you forgive it makes it easier to move on...I would recommend it!

Number 10. Ring at least one out of town friend every week.

Number 10. Ring at least one out of town friend every week.

I'm afraid this hasn't gone very well, but it wasn't for the want of trying! I started out with the very best of intentions, but trying to get hold of friends who like me all have busy lives is VERY difficult!

I would like to think that I am a thoughtful friend, I love all my friends dearly and have many that live nearby but also plenty who live some distance away. I know that with all my friends we may not see or speak to each other often but when we do we always just pick up where we left off!

I text, Facebook, Twitter with friends all the time and that is a good quick way of keeping reasonably up to date but its not the same as a good old natter!

So I apologise to all my out of town friends, I tried and failed at this!! But I still do love you!!